Probably ever since civilization
began, people have been debating about how Evil came into the
world and what we can do to combat it. There has always been a
diffuse intuitive conviction that the seeds of Evil are to be
sought in childhood, but the ruling tendency has been to imagine
it as something congenital, the manifestation of innate
destructive instincts best transformed into goodness, decency, and
nobility of character by a liberal dose of corporal punishment.
This is a position that is still frequently championed. Today,
no one seriously believes that the Devil has a hand in things,
smuggling some changeling into the cradle and forcing us to employ
strict upbringing methods to batter this diabolical offspring into
submission. But from some quarters we do hear the serious
contention that there are such things as genes that predispose
certain individuals to delinquency. The quest for these rogue
genes has inspired many a respectable research project, even
though the hypotheses behind it fly in the face of a number of
proven facts. Advocates of the "congenital evil" theory
would, for example, have to explain why, 30 to 40 years before the
Third Reich reared its ugly head, there was such a sudden spate of
children with "bad genes" ready at a later date to do
Hitler's bidding with such alacrity.
Sufficient scientific evidence has been marshaled to refute the
notion that some people are just "born bad." This absurd
myth, encountered in almost all cultures, has been effectively
exploded. It is dead, but it refuses to lie down. We know today
that the brain we are born with is not the finished product it was
once thought to be. The structuring of the brain depends very much
on experiences gone through in the first hours, days and weeks of
a person's life. The stimulus indispensable for developing the
capacity for empathy, say, is the experience of loving care. In
the absence of such care, when a child is forced to grow up
neglected, emotionally starved, and subjected to physical cruelty,
he or she will forfeit this innate capacity.
Of course we do not arrive in this world as a clean slate.
Every new baby comes with a history of its own, the history of the
nine months between conception and birth. In addition, children
have the genetic blueprint they inherit from their parents. These
factors may determine what kind of a temperament a child will
have, what inclinations, gifts, pre-dispositions. But character
depends crucially upon whether a person is given love, protection,
tenderness and understanding in the early formative years or
exposed to rejection, coldness, indifference, cruelty. The number
of children committing murders is on the increase, and very many
of them were born to adolescent, drug-dependent mothers. Extreme
neglect, lack of attachment, and traumatization are the rule in
such cases.
In the last few years, neuro-biologists have further
established that traumatized and neglected children display severe
lesions affecting anything up to 30% of those areas of the brain
that control our emotions. Severe traumas inflicted on infants
lead to an increase in the release of stress hormones that destroy
the existing, newly formed neurons and their interconnections.
More than anyone else, the credit for recognizing the immense
import of these discoveries for our understanding of infant
development and the delayed effects of traumas and neglect must go
to neurologist and child psychiatrist Dr. Bruce D. Perry. His
studies confirm what I described in my book For Your Own Good 20
years ago as a result of observing my patients and studying
educational literature. In that work I quoted extensively from the
manuals of what I have called the poisonous pedagogy with their
insistence on the importance of drumming the principles of
obedience and cleanliness into babies in the very first days and
weeks of their existence. Studying this literature helped me to
understand what made it possible for individuals such as Adolf
Eichmann to function like killer robots without even the slightest
stirrings of compunction. The people who turned into Hitler's
willing executioners had accounts to settle that dated back to
their earliest days. They were people who had never been given the
opportunity for an adequate response to the extreme cruelty
inflicted on them in infancy. Their latent destructive potential
was not the product of some Freudian "death drive" but
the early suppression of natural reactions.
The fact that the monstrous advice about "good"
parenting disseminated by self-styled educationalists in Germany
around 1860 went into as many as 40 editions led me to conclude
that most parents had read them and did indeed act - in good faith
- on the recommendations set out there. They beat their children
from the outset because they had been told this was the way to
make decent members of society out of them. 40 years later, the
children thus treated did the same with their children. They
didn't know any better. Born 30 to 40 years before the Holocaust,
those traumatized children later became Hitler's adherents,
adulators, and henchmen. In my view, it was the direct result of
their early drilling. The cruelty they experienced turned them
into emotional cripples incapable of developing any kind of
empathy for the sufferings of others. At the same time it made
them into people living with a time-bomb, unconsciously waiting
for an opportunity of venting on others the rage pent up inside
them. Hitler gave them the legal scapegoat they needed to acting
out their early feelings and their thirst for vengeance.
The latest discoveries about the human brain might have been
expected to bring about a radical change in our thinking about
children and the way we treat them. But as we know only too well,
old habits die hard. It takes at least two generations for young
parents to free themselves of the burden of inherited
"wisdom" and stop beating their own children, two
generations until it has become impossible to give one's child a
slap "inadvertently", two generations before the weight
of newly acquired knowledge gets in the way of the hand raised to
deal the "unthinking" blow.
Alongside the habits stored in our bodies and favoring
misguided behavior, there are also a host of opinions still
passionately advocated by experts although they are demonstrably
false. One of these is the belief that in the long run the effects
of corporal punishment are salutary rather than detrimental. Such
opinions can only be espoused by dint of completely ignoring the
childhood factor and its effects on the later development of
individuals. As the experts in question inherited these opinions
from their parents when they were children themselves, their
belief in them prevails over all the weight of scientific evidence
pointing to the contrary.
These thoughts, which I have set out in much greater detail in
my latest book Paths of Life, will perhaps suffice to
suggest the immense significance I ascribe to the experiences
undergone by infants in the first days, weeks and months of their
lives to explain their later behavior. In no way do I wish to
assert that later influences are completely ineffectual. On the
contrary. For a traumatized or neglected child it is of crucial
importance to encounter what I call a "helping" or a
"knowing witness" in its immediate circle. But such
witnesses can only really help if they are aware of the
consequences of early deprivations and do not play them down. It
is in disseminating the information required by such potential
knowing witnesses that I see my prime mission.
For a long time, the significance of the first few months of
life for the later adult was a neglected subject even among
psychologists. In several of my books I have tried to cast some
light on this area by discussing the biographies of dictators like
Hitler, Stalin, Ceaucescu and Mao and demonstrating how they
unconsciously reenacted their childhood situation on the political
stage. Here, however, I want to turn my attention away from
history and the past and train my gaze on our present practice. My
conviction is that in numerous areas of practical life we could be
more productive if we paid the childhood factor greater heed than
is customarily the case. Here are some examples.
The area in which the willful neglect of the childhood factor
is most apparent is, so it seems to me, the penal system.
Statistics tell us that 90% of the prisoners in American jails
were abused in childhood. This figure is astonishingly high if we
bear in mind the denial and repression factor. Probably the real
figure is closer to a full 100%. A sheltered and respected child
does not turn criminal. But most delinquents deny the sufferings
they went through as a child. Despite that, we still have this
high - and highly eloquent - figure. Unfortunately little has been
done to integrate this knowledge into the way prisons are
organized and run. Outwardly, of course, today's prisons and
penitentiaries have little in common with the grim fortresses of
the 19th century. But one thing has stayed much the same:
questions like what made an individual prisoner a criminal in the
first place, what features of his early life set him off in that
direction, and what he could do to avoid falling into the same
trap over and over again are very rarely posed. In order to answer
these questions himself, the prisoner would have to be encouraged
to talk, write and think about his life as a child and share these
facts with others in a structured group setting.
In my latest book I report on a program of this nature in
Canada. Thanks to group work, a number of fathers who had sexually
abused their daughters understood for the first time that their
actions were criminal. Of crucial importance for them was that
they were able to talk about their childhood to other people they
trusted. That way they learned to grasp how they had automatically
passed on something they had experienced themselves without
realizing it.
We are accustomed not to say anything about the things we have
suffered in childhood and frequently, instead of saying anything,
we act blindly instead. But it was precisely the opportunity for
talking about these things that released these prisoners from
their blindness, gave them access to heightened awareness and
protected them from acting out. Programs like these are
unfortunately still very much the exception. The only other one I
know of is at a prison in Arizona where violent criminals can talk
about their childhood and with the help of the group learn to
decipher the covert meaning in their life histories. I have seen
video recordings of these group sessions and I was impressed by
the change in the facial expressions of these men after therapy.
Proceeding in this way regularly would probably save a great deal
of the taxpayer's money; programs like these are not expensive to
organize and the danger of relapse is significantly diminished. It
is thus doubly surprising that they have not found their way into
most prisons.
A similar lack of interest is discernible on the political
stage. The more the danger of nationalism threatens our world, the
more frequently we must reckon with the emergence of unpredictable
dictators. Dictators are simply a subgroup of people exposed to
serious physical and mental jeopardy during childhood. They invest
all their innate energies and talents in making sure that they are
never placed in that kind of helpless position again. They
frequently develop a maniac hatred for one particular group in
society (Jews, intellectuals, ethnic groups) who for them
represent, vicariously and symbolically, their former persecutors
and whom they feel they must overcome if not eradicate at all
costs if they want to survive. They expend all their military
power on protecting themselves from a danger that has long since
ceased to exist except in their imaginations and are all but
inaccessible to logical arguments in connection with that danger.
Thus in order to achieve any kind of constructive and productive
communication with them we would need to know a great deal about
the childhood of these people and the dynamics of childhood in
general. Unhappily this is normally not the case and it is hard to
find anyone who would be prepared to act upon the results of such
an inquiry. The tendency is to trust to the destructive measures
of direct confrontation rather than the productive fruits of
direct communication. But it is not enough to know that we are
dealing with dangerous individuals who ought to be "taken out
of circulation" before they can kill other people, or to know
that the ethnic group in question only has a symbolic significance
for the dictator. The point is to understand the motives behind
his maniac actions on the basis of his life history and not to
play his game, not to be maneuvered into the role of persecutor,
thus playing along with the role assigned to us in the dictator's
own personal reenactment or scenario. Threats and the use of
destructive weaponry can set off paradoxical reactions in
individuals laboring under a legacy of serious humiliation. They
help dictators to cement their hardened positions, to exploit the
lack of contacts to cover their tracks even more effectively, and
to profit from the image of the persecuted victim.
There are many areas where concern with early childhood can
represent a liberation from age-old blind alleys. One of these is
school. Here the findings of the neuro-biologists have yet to be
given any real credence. Many teachers cannot imagine a school
system without punishment and penalization. But we know beyond
doubt that punishment has at best a short-term
"positive" effect. In the long run, the exertion of
force merely serves to reinforce aggressive behavior on the part
of children and adolescents. If children from a background of
domestic violence have to devote all their attention to averting
danger, they will hardly be able to concentrate on the subject
matter they are being taught. They may well expend a great deal of
effort on observing the teacher so as to be prepared for the
physical "correction" that they feel, fatalistically, to
be inevitable. In reality as they see it, they can hardly afford
to develop an interest in what their teachers are trying to tell
them. Yet more blows, yet more punishment are hardly likely to
allay this effect; on the other hand, understanding for these
children's fears could quite literally "move mountains."
But the teacher must never play down the reality of the abused
child if he or she really wants to help. And helping instead of
punishing would be to the advantage of the teacher and his role as
an instructor. But teachers who have themselves grown up with
punishment favor punishment in the face of all the logic that
militates against it because they have learned at a very early
stage to believe in its efficacy. Neither in their own childhood
nor during their training as teachers have they had the
opportunity to develop a sensibility for the sufferings of
children.
We come across the same phenomenon in the field of legislation.
As long as we are unaware of the degree to which the right to
human dignity has been denied us in our own childhood, it is
anything but easy to truly concede that right to our children,
however sincerely we may wish to do so. Frequently we believe we
are acting in the interests of the children and fail to realize
that we may be doing the very opposite, simply because we have
learned to be unfeeling in this respect at such an early stage
that the effects of this inculcation are stronger than all the
things we learn later. We can see this from an actual instance of
present-day legislation. Only a short while ago, 1997, the German
Parliament expressly conceded natural parents the right to
physical correction. This right is only denied to non-blood
relatives: teachers, foster-parents, guardians etc. So we see that
the majority of the parliamentarians (4/5) are firmly convinced
that in certain cases corporal punishment meted out by the parents
can have a salutary effect. The argument persistently advanced for
this was that physical force should not be prohibited because this
phenomenon could be drawn upon to acquaint children with the
dangers lying in wait for them on the roads, thus helping them to
learn to protect themselves.
But the only thing a beaten child will learn is to fear its
parents, not to be careful on the roads. This way, children will
also learn to play down their own pain and feel guilty. Being
subjected to physical attacks they are defenseless to fend off
merely instill in them a "gut" conviction that children
obviously merit neither protection nor respect. This false message
is then stored in the children's bodies as information and will
influence their view of the world and their later attitude to
their own children. Such children will be unable to defend their
right to human dignity, unable to recognize physical pain as a
danger signal and act accordingly. Even their immune system may be
affected. In the absence of other persons to model their behavior
on, without knowing or at least helping witnesses, these children
will see the language of violence and hypocrisy as the only really
effective means of communication. Naturally enough, they will
avail themselves of that language themselves when they grow up
because adults will normally elect to keep suppressed feelings of
powerlessness in a state of suppression. Unfortunately, many of us
defend the old system of care-giving with all the energy and
conviction we can muster. This may be the reason behind this
astounding decision to vote against a ban on corporal punishment.
This universal denial of sufferings most of us have been
through also leads to a situation where even in cases of mass
murder hardly anyone takes any real interest in the origins and
causes of such bottomless hatred. All kinds of factors are
examined with great care but no one ever asks where and how the
perpetrators of such acts acquired these models of violence. We
live in a society which regards hatred as innate, that is to say
God-given. It is a society that refuses to see that we keep on
producing hatred by inculcating models of violence into our
children, behavior patterns that can prove stronger than anything
they may learn at a later stage. There is a widespread tendency to
blame all kinds of uncongenial things on the education system but
education to violence begins much earlier and there is nothing
that schools can do about those cases where a child has grown up
devoid of an empathic home environment, without anyone prepared to
relate and sympathize with his or her distress.
Equally surprising is the lack of interest shown by biographers
about the initial, all-important imprint left on people by the
treatment given them in their early years. With the exception of
psychohistorians, hardly any biographer has delved into the
childhood of political leaders, individuals whose sometimes
fateful decisions can mean life or death, happiness or horror for
millions of people. In all the thousands of books about Hitler or
Stalin hardly any mention is made of the tell-tale details of
their childhood. And where mention is made of them, lack of
psychological knowledge leads to their being played down and
denied any crucial significance. But there is much to learn from
these facts. We can see this more clearly from two contrasting
examples: Stalin and Gorbachev.
Stalin was the only child of an alcoholic who beat him soundly
every day and a mother who never protected him, was beaten herself
and usually stayed away from home. Like Hitler's mother she had
already lost three children when her son was born. Joseph, the
only surviving child, never know with any certainty whether his
father might not decide to kill him at the next opportunity. When
he grew up, his suppressed panic fear was transformed into
paranoia, the maniac conviction that everyone else was out to kill
him. That was why in the 1930s he had millions of people
slaughtered or put into concentration camps. The impression one
has is that when all is said and done the all-powerful and
idolized dictator was nothing other than a helpless child still
fighting a hopeless battle against the overwhelming threat of a
brutal father. In the trials orchestrated against thinkers and
writers Stalin was perhaps trying to prevent his own father from
killing the little boy he once was. Naturally he had no knowledge
of this. If he had, it might have saved millions of lives.
A very different picture is presented by the Gorbachev family,
where there was no tradition of child-maltreatment but instead a
tradition of respect for the child and his needs. The consequences
can be observed from the behavior displayed by the adult
Gorbachev. He has given ample evidence of qualities hardly any
other living statesman has demonstrated to the same degree: the
courage to look facts in the face and to seek flexible solutions,
respect for others, give-and-take in dialog situations, absence of
hypocrisy, a complete absence of grandeur in the conduct of his
personal life. He has never been driven by blind self-assertion to
make absurd decisions. Both his parents and his grandparents (the
latter looked after him during the war years) appear to have been
people with an unusual capacity for love and affection. The
unanimous verdict on Gorbachev's father, who died in 1976, is that
he was a lovable, modest man, amicable and peaceable in his
dealings with others, a man who was never heard to raise his
voice. The mother is described as sturdy, sincere and cheerful.
Even after her son had become a prominent personality, she went on
living modestly and happily in her small farmhouse. Gorbachev's
childhood also supplies further proof that even severest penury
will have no adverse effect on the character of a child as long as
that child's personal integrity is not damaged by hypocrisy,
cruelty, abuse, corporal punishment, and psychological
humiliation. Stalin's regime of terror, the horrors of war, the
brutal occupation of his country, immense poverty, crippling
physical labor - all these things were part and parcel of
Gorbachev's youth. But a child can survive all that unscathed as
long as the emotional atmosphere prevailing at home provides
protection and security. One incident may serve to illustrates the
atmosphere I am referring to. At the end of the war Mikhail
Gorbachev was unable to attend school for 3 months because he had
no shoes to wear. When his father was told of this (he was wounded
and had been committed to a field hospital) he wrote to his wife
saying that she must at all costs ensure that Mischa could go back
to school because he was such an avid scholar. The mother sold the
last of her sheep for 1,500 rubles and bought her son a pair of
military boots. His grandfather procured a warm coat for him and
at the request of his grandson another one for a friend of his.
Protection and respect for the needs of a child - this is
surely something we ought to be able to take for granted. But it
is far from being the case. We live in a world peopled by
individuals who have grown up deprived of their rights, deprived
of respect. As adults they then attempt to regain those rights by
force (blackmail, threats, the use of weapons). As Gorbachev's
childhood is apparently much more the exception than the rule, the
society we live in continues to turn a blind eye to the facts of
child abuse in all its forms. Thousands of professors at hundreds
of universities teach all manner of subjects, but there is not one
single university chair for research into child abuse and cruelty
to children. How strange, when we recall that the majority of the
people living on this earth are victims of precisely that kind of
treatment! It is entirely conceivable that the world as we know it
might come to an end as a result of the consequence of those
ubiquitous violations of human dignity. At all events, it is high
time that we investigated the regularities discernible behind each
and every individual case.
As a priority commitment for the next decade, the United
Nations Organization has declared its allegiance to the idea and
implementation of Education for Peace. This cannot be achieved by
fine words alone. We need to set an example to our children as the
people who will decide what the next generation will look like,
and show them that coexistence and communication without violence
is actually possible. There are an ever greater number of parents
who are capable of doing so and who are aware of the far-reaching
implications of their own behavior. Many of them agree that
physical force against children should be banned by law.
This verified and firmly established knowledge cannot but
spread, albeit gradually, in the millennium to come, even though
at present the number of people who have understood what is at
stake is small. But if this group succeeds in getting physical
correction banned by law - as has already happened in nine
European countries - then the next generation will grow up without
spanking and beating, and that means growing up free of a legacy
that can only set them off on a course that is fateful indeed. It
is realistic to hope that this fact will lead to an increase in
the number of knowing witnesses and hence to a swift change in
general mentality.